What if my spouse doesn’t agree with me about tithing?
Because tithing involves money, it is a prime candidate for controversy between a husband and wife (many marital problems stem from finances). However, if both spouses are Christians, they should have a desire to please the Lord and understand tithing is God-ordained, not just a personal desire that the wife is trying to impose on the husband or vice versa. First, ask your spouse to list reasons why they do not support tithing. Review them and answer them by scripture. Secondly, if they are adamant about not tithing, you cannot make them. You have options. You can tithe from your income and show them how blessings are perpetual in your life. The results from obedience can never be denied. Trust that God will bless your obedience. The problem becomes more complicated when one spouse is an unbeliever. If the wife is an unbeliever, the husband must obey the Lord’s direction. He must realize, however, that the Lord is more concerned about his wife’s soul than his money. If tithing becomes a stumbling block to his wife, he should consider not tithing temporarily in order to win his wife to the Lord. If the unbelieving spouse is the husband, then the wife should submit to his wishes, trusting that her submissive attitude may win him to the Lord (1 Peter 3:1-6). One idea is to ask your spouse to join you in taking the challenge God gives in Malachi 3:10. Do the test over a 90-day period. If you are worse off financially as a result of tithing, tell them you will agree to cease to give. But if you are better off, the spouse should be allowed to tithe. Often, this is just the opportunity for God to prove Himself to an unbelieving spouse. “One person gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.” (Proverbs 11:24-25)
Because tithing involves money, it is a prime candidate for controversy between a husband and wife (many marital problems stem from finances). However, if both spouses are Christians, they should have a desire to please the Lord and understand tithing is God-ordained, not just a personal desire that the wife is trying to impose on the husband or vice versa. First, ask your spouse to list reasons why they do not support tithing. Review them and answer them by scripture. Secondly, if they are adamant about not tithing, you cannot make them. You have options. You can tithe from your income and show them how blessings are perpetual in your life. The results from obedience can never be denied. Trust that God will bless your obedience. The problem becomes more complicated when one spouse is an unbeliever. If the wife is an unbeliever, the husband must obey the Lord’s direction. He must realize, however, that the Lord is more concerned about his wife’s soul than his money. If tithing becomes a stumbling block to his wife, he should consider not tithing temporarily in order to win his wife to the Lord. If the unbelieving spouse is the husband, then the wife should submit to his wishes, trusting that her submissive attitude may win him to the Lord (1 Peter 3:1-6). One idea is to ask your spouse to join you in taking the challenge God gives in Malachi 3:10. Do the test over a 90-day period. If you are worse off financially as a result of tithing, tell them you will agree to cease to give. But if you are better off, the spouse should be allowed to tithe. Often, this is just the opportunity for God to prove Himself to an unbelieving spouse. “One person gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.” (Proverbs 11:24-25)
